Vision

I've been planning to take this blog down. Now that my book is about to launch, it makes me nervous that someone would actually read this. But it seemed sad to end on such a low note as the last post. Almost a year later, Dad is hanging in there and is a lot more together than last year. Melody is married now, and I like my new son-in-law. Lancelot is in school, training for a new career. All good changes.

I had a vision last summer, and while I did write it down, it feels too personal to post. The gist of it is this: God loves my child even more than I do. And there is no gender in heaven. It has brought me to a place of--if not joy--acceptance. This one isn't mine to fix and Melody is more important to me than her gender. I will never be completely on board with the "transgender cause." But it doesn't matter. I love my child and we have what we have. I've gotten a son-in-law in the bargain, and that's a pretty good bonus. And I can't spend the rest of my life mourning Maverick when Melody is standing right in front of me.

Sometimes you just have to open your hands.